Self-esteem is very interesting. When you lack it, you go around thinking you're worth very little or nothing, which further lowers your self-esteem. I had that for a very long time. I had it for so long I guess I still have a problem putting worth in myself.
But the minute you start getting some self-esteem, it rolls like a snowball. Shortly after you prove to yourself that you can do great stuff and suddenly your self-esteem is up there with the best, elbowing.
It's not hard to see which situation is the better, but what IS hard is to see how the transition was made. In learning how it changed, you can use that again if need arises.
So back to identifying the catalyst: I was feeling crap, went to Communicare and now I feel great. So what happened att Communicare then? Sure, the people there was a great inspiration and help, but I can't call them every time i have a bad day, now can I?
What happened was that I realised some truths about the world and myself. I realised that no one actually cares about me. I mean this in the "you gotta get your own job, because noone is going to give you anything for free" kind of way. No one will give you anything for free. It sounds negative, but it is positive. Any favour given is expected to be returned. Use it yourself, and it will work in your favour.
This is what "Start saying yes to stuff" means. Start accepting some volunteer work and watch how your efforts get remembered and you start getting emails and phone calls. Give and ye shall recieve.
The next thing that i realised was that if I don't admit my own worth, why should anyone else do it? By this I mean that, if I don't think i can do the job, why should anyone else sacrifice their time on finding out? This is also not soemthing negative its very positive. You won't know what you can do until you try.
Third thing I learned was "accepting failure". Failing is awsome. It teaches you what you can become better at. It shows you exacly what you need to improve where a success doesnt tell you anything except "yupp, you could do that". A success won't help you improve just reassure you of something you already knew.
Fourth thing I discovered was the drive that is inside. It will only show itself if you do something that interests it. Find that drive's excitements! Of course, that's the tricky part. How do you find out what you really want to do? Well, it won't jump at you through the window while you sit on your couch feeling sorry for yourself, that's for sure!
In a different order:
1. Find out what you want to do. Try stuff. Test your abilities. See what you think is fun.
2. Fail! It will teach you more about yourself than a success.
3. Realise your worth. not to the world, not to your employer, not to your friends. to YOU!
4. Learn that nothing is for free. The world is founded on scratching backs. Use it to your advantage!
So, all in all I think finding self-esteem is to learn more about yourself. Take the time to learn how you work, and use that to improve your life even further. We live only once, and there's only two things that are certain: death and taxes.
The rest is up to you.
until next time Mr. Imaginary Reader!
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